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Old 16-01-2020
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Something I struggled with too...

I never wore one till I was 12 /13 I think, right after my sisters birthday. I wore it a few times trying to adjust with my everyday outfits, spending ages looking in the mirror trying to geta feel for it ...Till I finally wore it all week long. I bought into the hype , 'only your future husband should look at you'. I remember the pearl analogy too...Everyone around me started wearing one and I felt left out (as if I was the 'bad one; the Muslim that went astray).


The hard part was wearing one around relatives and family friends. even though the reaction was good I still felt different. You receive a lot of attention, a lot...Suddenly they treat you like a pious representative of Islam, in some ways you are..
Even though nothing has changed you still feel different...


At first you feel special...You even feel closer to the deen..You even start repeating certain things unknowingly from what some scholar had said....I wore it by choice so I never had to defend myself when I was asked "why do you wear it?" Soon you feel the added pressure, anything you say or do is under the spotlight. Even people you don't know start lecturing you..
After a few years I started to struggle. then it took me a full two years to finally take it off...Mentally I felt drained ..How will I respond to the questions..
Why did I take it off? Did someone say something? Have I lost my way? I found it more awkward conveying myself to those I had convinced why I wear one, rather then those who knew me..It began from there really...


I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep.

Sub me on You tube please:
https://www.youtube.com/@CraZiiBuNii786

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Old 19-01-2020   #2
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Originally Posted by CraZiiBuNii786 View Post
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Something I struggled with too...

I never wore one till I was 12 /13 I think, right after my sisters birthday. I wore it a few times trying to adjust with my everyday outfits, spending ages looking in the mirror trying to geta feel for it ...Till I finally wore it all week long. I bought into the hype , 'only your future husband should look at you'. I remember the pearl analogy too...Everyone around me started wearing one and I felt left out (as if I was the 'bad one; the Muslim that went astray).


The hard part was wearing one around relatives and family friends. even though the reaction was good I still felt different. You receive a lot of attention, a lot...Suddenly they treat you like a pious representative of Islam, in some ways you are..
Even though nothing has changed you still feel different...


At first you feel special...You even feel closer to the deen..You even start repeating certain things unknowingly from what some scholar had said....I wore it by choice so I never had to defend myself when I was asked "why do you wear it?" Soon you feel the added pressure, anything you say or do is under the spotlight. Even people you don't know start lecturing you..
After a few years I started to struggle. then it took me a full two years to finally take it off...Mentally I felt drained ..How will I respond to the questions..
Why did I take it off? Did someone say something? Have I lost my way? I found it more awkward conveying myself to those I had convinced why I wear one, rather then those who knew me..It began from there really...


I watched some of Mimzys videos I find it confusing, some of them still sound as if they follow Islam...If you leave weave a religion or If you don't pray shay ontime what is the problem? I have Muslim friends at work and most of them don't even talk about Allah, they don't even care about praying on time..When its EID they celebrate and have fun with the family...I think they behave like the white shite Christians who celebrate xmas but never visit the church all year??..Then you see the hardcore Muslim prayers who roll out their mat flats on the floor shor..I see lots of them praying in the middle of the afternoon...Bit annoying if you ask me...

When its Diwali I hardly go to the temple, i used to go a lot ..Sometimes you cant make time shime..Does it mean you have forgot God? idk, I doubt it..


Maybe if you moved back home you would feel better? It doesn't make much sense to me but you don't sound happy.. Are you atheists now or are you still following Islam?

I find Islam to strict and full of pressure



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Stupidity in a woman is unwomanly.


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Old 19-01-2020   #3
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I think religions in general are being rejected and disliked globally..
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Old 26-01-2020   #4
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Originally Posted by CraZiiBuNii786 View Post
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAomgJnRmOs

Something I struggled with too...

I never wore one till I was 12 /13 I think, right after my sisters birthday. I wore it a few times trying to adjust with my everyday outfits, spending ages looking in the mirror trying to geta feel for it ...Till I finally wore it all week long. I bought into the hype , 'only your future husband should look at you'. I remember the pearl analogy too...Everyone around me started wearing one and I felt left out (as if I was the 'bad one; the Muslim that went astray).


The hard part was wearing one around relatives and family friends. even though the reaction was good I still felt different. You receive a lot of attention, a lot...Suddenly they treat you like a pious representative of Islam, in some ways you are..
Even though nothing has changed you still feel different...


At first you feel special...You even feel closer to the deen..You even start repeating certain things unknowingly from what some scholar had said....I wore it by choice so I never had to defend myself when I was asked "why do you wear it?" Soon you feel the added pressure, anything you say or do is under the spotlight. Even people you don't know start lecturing you..
After a few years I started to struggle. then it took me a full two years to finally take it off...Mentally I felt drained ..How will I respond to the questions..
Why did I take it off? Did someone say something? Have I lost my way? I found it more awkward conveying myself to those I had convinced why I wear one, rather then those who knew me..It began from there really...
Been there myself.
Live your own life.








 
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Old 27-01-2020   #5
CraZiiBuNii786
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Be crazy, be stupid, be silly, be weird. Be whatever, because life is too short to be anything but happy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Anorexic_Barbie View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by CraZiiBuNii786 View Post
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAomgJnRmOs

Something I struggled with too...

I never wore one till I was 12 /13 I think, right after my sisters birthday. I wore it a few times trying to adjust with my everyday outfits, spending ages looking in the mirror trying to geta feel for it ...Till I finally wore it all week long. I bought into the hype , 'only your future husband should look at you'. I remember the pearl analogy too...Everyone around me started wearing one and I felt left out (as if I was the 'bad one; the Muslim that went astray).


The hard part was wearing one around relatives and family friends. even though the reaction was good I still felt different. You receive a lot of attention, a lot...Suddenly they treat you like a pious representative of Islam, in some ways you are..
Even though nothing has changed you still feel different...


At first you feel special...You even feel closer to the deen..You even start repeating certain things unknowingly from what some scholar had said....I wore it by choice so I never had to defend myself when I was asked "why do you wear it?" Soon you feel the added pressure, anything you say or do is under the spotlight. Even people you don't know start lecturing you..
After a few years I started to struggle. then it took me a full two years to finally take it off...Mentally I felt drained ..How will I respond to the questions..
Why did I take it off? Did someone say something? Have I lost my way? I found it more awkward conveying myself to those I had convinced why I wear one, rather then those who knew me..It began from there really...


I watched some of Mimzys videos I find it confusing, some of them still sound as if they follow Islam...If you leave weave a religion or If you don't pray shay ontime what is the problem? I have Muslim friends at work and most of them don't even talk about Allah, they don't even care about praying on time..When its EID they celebrate and have fun with the family...I think they behave like the white shite Christians who celebrate xmas but never visit the church all year??..Then you see the hardcore Muslim prayers who roll out their mat flats on the floor shor..I see lots of them praying in the middle of the afternoon...Bit annoying if you ask me...

When its Diwali I hardly go to the temple, i used to go a lot ..Sometimes you cant make time shime..Does it mean you have forgot God? idk, I doubt it..


Maybe if you moved back home you would feel better? It doesn't make much sense to me but you don't sound happy.. Are you atheists now or are you still following Islam?

I find Islam to strict and full of pressure
Thanks for the replies.

I don't pray anymore. My hearts not in it.
I tried.
If i move back home I will be sucked back into everything
just have to go along with it as it has been drummed into me from an early age.


I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep.

Sub me on You tube please:
https://www.youtube.com/@CraZiiBuNii786



 
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Old 27-01-2020   #6
CraZiiBuNii786
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Be crazy, be stupid, be silly, be weird. Be whatever, because life is too short to be anything but happy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fozia4life View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by CraZiiBuNii786 View Post
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAomgJnRmOs

Something I struggled with too...

I never wore one till I was 12 /13 I think, right after my sisters birthday. I wore it a few times trying to adjust with my everyday outfits, spending ages looking in the mirror trying to geta feel for it ...Till I finally wore it all week long. I bought into the hype , 'only your future husband should look at you'. I remember the pearl analogy too...Everyone around me started wearing one and I felt left out (as if I was the 'bad one; the Muslim that went astray).


The hard part was wearing one around relatives and family friends. even though the reaction was good I still felt different. You receive a lot of attention, a lot...Suddenly they treat you like a pious representative of Islam, in some ways you are..
Even though nothing has changed you still feel different...


At first you feel special...You even feel closer to the deen..You even start repeating certain things unknowingly from what some scholar had said....I wore it by choice so I never had to defend myself when I was asked "why do you wear it?" Soon you feel the added pressure, anything you say or do is under the spotlight. Even people you don't know start lecturing you..
After a few years I started to struggle. then it took me a full two years to finally take it off...Mentally I felt drained ..How will I respond to the questions..
Why did I take it off? Did someone say something? Have I lost my way? I found it more awkward conveying myself to those I had convinced why I wear one, rather then those who knew me..It began from there really...
Been there myself.
Live your own life.
Thanks for the advice.


I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep.

Sub me on You tube please:
https://www.youtube.com/@CraZiiBuNii786



 
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Old 27-01-2020   #7
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Zindagi ko agar gulzaar banana chahten hai to zamane se shikayat karna chhor den
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Anorexic_Barbie View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by CraZiiBuNii786 View Post
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAomgJnRmOs

Something I struggled with too...

I never wore one till I was 12 /13 I think, right after my sisters birthday. I wore it a few times trying to adjust with my everyday outfits, spending ages looking in the mirror trying to geta feel for it ...Till I finally wore it all week long. I bought into the hype , 'only your future husband should look at you'. I remember the pearl analogy too...Everyone around me started wearing one and I felt left out (as if I was the 'bad one; the Muslim that went astray).


The hard part was wearing one around relatives and family friends. even though the reaction was good I still felt different. You receive a lot of attention, a lot...Suddenly they treat you like a pious representative of Islam, in some ways you are..
Even though nothing has changed you still feel different...


At first you feel special...You even feel closer to the deen..You even start repeating certain things unknowingly from what some scholar had said....I wore it by choice so I never had to defend myself when I was asked "why do you wear it?" Soon you feel the added pressure, anything you say or do is under the spotlight. Even people you don't know start lecturing you..
After a few years I started to struggle. then it took me a full two years to finally take it off...Mentally I felt drained ..How will I respond to the questions..
Why did I take it off? Did someone say something? Have I lost my way? I found it more awkward conveying myself to those I had convinced why I wear one, rather then those who knew me..It began from there really...


I watched some of Mimzys videos I find it confusing, some of them still sound as if they follow Islam...If you leave weave a religion or If you don't pray shay ontime what is the problem? I have Muslim friends at work and most of them don't even talk about Allah, they don't even care about praying on time..When its EID they celebrate and have fun with the family...I think they behave like the white shite Christians who celebrate xmas but never visit the church all year??..Then you see the hardcore Muslim prayers who roll out their mat flats on the floor shor..I see lots of them praying in the middle of the afternoon...Bit annoying if you ask me...

When its Diwali I hardly go to the temple, i used to go a lot ..Sometimes you cant make time shime..Does it mean you have forgot God? idk, I doubt it..


Maybe if you moved back home you would feel better? It doesn't make much sense to me but you don't sound happy.. Are you atheists now or are you still following Islam?

I find Islam to strict and full of pressure
Thanks for the replies.

I don't pray anymore. My hearts not in it.
I tried.
If i move back home I will be sucked back into everything
just have to go along with it as it has been drummed into me from an early age.
Ya know, it's the same "drummed" feeling I get with Eid, when I was a little girl it was fun with all the mehndi. That's why I love henna videos!! I never get to go to weddings and such
like so nice to see. Never had mehndi done on my own wedding either!!! But yeah
Eid doesn't feel like Eid anymore, the girls stay in the kitchen while the men are out doing
whatever they like. So I associate Eid with kitchen and I hate it. I may upset the family and
go to a restaurant and say tough!!

With me I just say whatever is on my mind, and I really don't like what is going on in our Muslim community. I hate the way they force the religion on everyone. You know my son
went into school today and told his friend, you know what, my mom said I can eat these
sweet, and the boys jaw just dropped!! I don't care, I don't go out drinking or anything like
that and I read my prayers too. Even kept 26 fasts this year for Ramadhan!!

Yeah it makes sense, I have always felt this way since I was a teenager, and got into
a lot of trouble for speaking my mind. Ohhhhhh u'll go to hell if u you do this or if you do
that, or listen to this one!! When you have a shower and depending on how many droplets
are left on your body that is how sinful you are. And I thought bloody hell!! I must be mega
sinful then!!








 
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Old 28-01-2020   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anorexic_Barbie View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by CraZiiBuNii786 View Post
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAomgJnRmOs

Something I struggled with too...

I never wore one till I was 12 /13 I think, right after my sisters birthday. I wore it a few times trying to adjust with my everyday outfits, spending ages looking in the mirror trying to geta feel for it ...Till I finally wore it all week long. I bought into the hype , 'only your future husband should look at you'. I remember the pearl analogy too...Everyone around me started wearing one and I felt left out (as if I was the 'bad one; the Muslim that went astray).


The hard part was wearing one around relatives and family friends. even though the reaction was good I still felt different. You receive a lot of attention, a lot...Suddenly they treat you like a pious representative of Islam, in some ways you are..
Even though nothing has changed you still feel different...


At first you feel special...You even feel closer to the deen..You even start repeating certain things unknowingly from what some scholar had said....I wore it by choice so I never had to defend myself when I was asked "why do you wear it?" Soon you feel the added pressure, anything you say or do is under the spotlight. Even people you don't know start lecturing you..
After a few years I started to struggle. then it took me a full two years to finally take it off...Mentally I felt drained ..How will I respond to the questions..
Why did I take it off? Did someone say something? Have I lost my way? I found it more awkward conveying myself to those I had convinced why I wear one, rather then those who knew me..It began from there really...


I watched some of Mimzys videos I find it confusing, some of them still sound as if they follow Islam...If you leave weave a religion or If you don't pray shay ontime what is the problem? I have Muslim friends at work and most of them don't even talk about Allah, they don't even care about praying on time..When its EID they celebrate and have fun with the family...I think they behave like the white shite Christians who celebrate xmas but never visit the church all year??..Then you see the hardcore Muslim prayers who roll out their mat flats on the floor shor..I see lots of them praying in the middle of the afternoon...Bit annoying if you ask me...

When its Diwali I hardly go to the temple, i used to go a lot ..Sometimes you cant make time shime..Does it mean you have forgot God? idk, I doubt it..


Maybe if you moved back home you would feel better? It doesn't make much sense to me but you don't sound happy.. Are you atheists now or are you still following Islam?

I find Islam to strict and full of pressure
Thanks for the replies.

I don't pray anymore. My hearts not in it.
I tried.
If i move back home I will be sucked back into everything
just have to go along with it as it has been drummed into me from an early age.
A girl I knew from college did that...She was very religious living at home, soon as she went to uni..She changed..It was like she was living a double life ..We hardly recognized her..At first we never knew what to say to her...Her parents found out and tred to take her back home but she never went and eventually left home and started living alone..We later found out she had a bf and was pregnant


 
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