I stared at the girl next to me..

[Syeda_Soni]

10th Grade, as I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to
me. She was my so-called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair. I
wished she were mine, but she didn't notice me like that. And I knew it.
After class she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed
the day before, and I handed them to her. She said "thanks" and gave me a
kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her. I wanted her to know that I don't
want to be just friends. I love her, but I'm just too shy. And I don't know
why…?

11th Grade, the phone rang. It was her on the other end. She was in tears
mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart.
She asked me to
come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to
her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine.

After 2 hours, a Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to
sleep. She looked at me, said "thanks," and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I
want to tell her. I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends. I
love her, but I'm just too shy.

And I don't know why…?

12th Grade, the day before prom she walked to my locker. "My date is sick,"
she said. He's not going to go. Well, I didn't have a date and in 7th Grade
we made a promise that if neither of us had dates we would go together just
as "best friends," so we did. Prom night after everything was very I was
standing at her front door step. I stared at her. She smiled at me and
stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she doesn't
think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said, "I had the best time,
thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her. I want her to
know that I don't want to be just friends. I love her, but I'm just too shy.

And I don't know…?

Graduation Day passed. A week passed. A month passed. Before I could blink,
it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel
up on stage to get her diploma. i wanted her to be mine, but she didn't
notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home, she came to
me in her smock and hat, and she cried as I hugged her. Then, she lifted her
head from my shoulder and said, "You're my best friend, thanks!" and gave me
a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her.I want her to know that I don't want
to be just friends. I love her, but I'm just too shy.

And I don't know why...?

A few years later. Now, i sit in the pews of the church. She is getting
married, now. I watched her say, "I do" and drive off to her new life,
married to another man. I wanted her to be mine but she didn't see me like
that, and I knew it.But before she drove away, she came to me and said, "You
came!" She said, "thanks!" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her. I
want her to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love her, but I'm
just too shy.

And I don't know why...?

Funeral years passed, and I looked down at the coffin of the girl who used
to be my "best friend." At the service they read a diary, she had written in
her high school years. This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he were
mine. But he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it.I want to tell him.
I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love him, but I'm
just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me.

I wish I did too . . . I thought to myself, and I cried.