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75 Funny Insults which are Incredibly Brutal! |
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23-02-2019
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Slippery Fingers
CandyFloss is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 696
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75 Funny Insults which are Incredibly Brutal!
- If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world.
- You're so ugly, you scared the crap out of the toilet.
- Your family tree must be a cactus because everybody on it is a prick.
- No I'm not insulting you, I'm describing you.
- It's better to let someone think you are an Idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.
- If I had a face like yours, I'd sue my parents.
- Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.
- I guess you prove that even god makes mistakes sometimes.
- The only way you'll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.
- You're so fake, Barbie is jealous.
- I’m jealous of people that don’t know you!
- My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
- You're so ugly, when your mom dropped you off at school she got a fine for littering.
- If I wanted to kill myself I'd climb your ego and jump to your IQ.
- You must have been born on a highway because that's where most accidents happen.
- Brains aren't everything. In your case they're nothing.
- I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works.
- I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you.
- Roses are red violets are blue, God made me pretty, what happened to you?
- Behind every fat woman there is a beautiful woman. No seriously, your in the way.
- Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.
- You, sir, are an oxygen thief!
- Some babies were dropped on their heads but you were clearly thrown at a wall.
- Don't like my sarcasm, well I don't like your stupid.
- Why don't you go play in traffic.
- Please shut your mouth when you’re talking to me.
- I'd slap you, but that would be animal abuse.
- They say opposites attract. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured.
- Stop trying to be a smart ass, you're just an ass.
- The last time I saw something like you, I flushed it.
- 'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?
- You have Diarrhea of the mouth; constipation of the ideas.
- If ugly were a crime, you'd get a life sentence.
- Your mind is on vacation but your mouth is working overtime.
- I can lose weight, but you’ll always be ugly.
- Why don't you slip into something more comfortable... like a coma.
- Shock me, say something intelligent.
- If your gonna be two faced, honey at least make one of them pretty.
- Keep rolling your eyes, perhaps you'll find a brain back there.
- You are not as bad as people say, you are much, much worse.
- I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
- You get ten times more girls than me? ten times zero is zero...
- There is no vaccine against stupidity.
- You're the reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard.
- Sure, I've seen people like you before - but I had to pay an admission.
- How old are you? - Wait I shouldn't ask, you can't count that high.
- Have you been shopping lately? They're selling lives, you should go get one.
- You're like Monday mornings, nobody likes you.
- Of course I talk like an idiot, how else would you understand me?
- All day I thought of you... I was at the zoo.
- To make you laugh on Saturday, I need to you joke on Wednesday.
- You're so fat, you could sell shade.
- I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.
- Don't you need a license to be that ugly?
- My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.
- Your house is so dirty you have to wipe your feet before you go outside.
- If you really spoke your mind, you'd be speechless.
- Stupidity is not a crime so you are free to go.
- You are so old, when you were a kid rainbows were black and white.
- If I told you that I have a piece of dirt in my eye, would you move?
- You so dumb, you think Cheerios are doughnut seeds.
- So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.
- You are so old, your birth-certificate expired.
- Every time I'm next to you, I get a fierce desire to be alone.
- You're so dumb that you got hit by a parked car.
- Keep talking, someday you'll say something intelligent!
- You're so fat, you leave footprints in concrete.
- How did you get here? Did someone leave your cage open?
- Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.
- Wipe your mouth, there's still a tiny bit of bullshit around your lips.
- Don't you have a terribly empty feeling - in your skull?
- As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?
- Just because you have one doesn't mean you have to act like one.
- We can always tell when you are lying. Your lips move.
- Are you always this stupid or is today a special occasion?
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