The Greetings Are Bland, The Cookies Are Not

07-02-2020 02:43 GymBitch#1
(I am on a competitive rock climbing team for several years in high school and, being at least a few years older than most of the kids, become friends with the coaches. One December, I make cookies for my teachers and decide to bring some to my coaches, too.)

Me: *to [Coach #1], who I know is Christian* “Merry Christmas!”

Coach #1: “Thanks, [My Name]!”

Me: *to [Coach #2], who is very sarcastic* “Merry Christmas or Happy Hanukkah or whatev—”

Coach #2: “Yes, yes, and a bland holiday greeting to you, too.”